there is no cure

For sadness but to learn something (T.H. White)

[audio:https://eleanorjjackson.files.wordpress.com/2011/10/06-the-cure.mp3|titles=06 The Cure]

I have always liked this quote, and have often tried to apply to times of sadness, trying to learn in the more profound sense by piecing together the meaning of whatever was going wrong at the time in the hope that I might at least come out the other side thinking “well, I’m glad I know that now”. Usually, at the time I was not glad at all, but later sometimes gladness appeared. I have also tried to distract myself from sadness by learning in a more prosaic way, trying to master really basic things, like how to conjugate French verbs, or cook banana bread or change a washer, as if somehow the ability to do something quite simple might help demonstrate to yourself that you were the master of your own universe or something. Both are equally effective and ineffective, depending on how sad you are.

Sadly, however, I am not at all sad right now*. Instead, I am just a bit sick. I have drunk all the echinacea in the house and have dozed fitfully all morning through the construction work outside my house, and all I have learnt is that I am prepared to read Enduro magazine to kill time, although it represents a serious departure from my typical magazine fare.

This is what cycling articles usually look like to me.

I see now, I was living in a white space dream. This is what a cycling article can really look like.

God, check out all that text. People with headaches can’t read such nonsense.

Interestingly, on page 24 of Magazine on the Right, was a picture of Jess Douglas who – coincidentally will be one of the MTB Skills people on the weekend AND coming along to the Birthday Party. I believe this is very meaningful, to be on page 24 that is, because Jess is the World 24 Hour and 2 x Australian 24 Hour Solo MTB Champion. Which basically means she likes riding a lot.

Are you coming along to the Birthday Party? Or are you doing Around the Bay in a Day?

*I’d have to say, in the big picture, I’m downright chipper.

By Eleanor Jackson

Eleanor Jackson is a Filipino Australian poet, performer, arts producer, cyclist, writer, gal about town, feminist, freewheeler, and friend.

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